Jo Black. (Foto: Facebook)
Safety, love, care, provision and the heart of a home.
This is how Afrikaans singer and songwriter Jo Black describes the role of a father.
“I think many people underestimate the role of a good father in a child’s life. A father builds the foundation for young people’s future. If you have a healthy husband, you have a healthy household,” says Jo.
“I am the father of two daughters myself, and I know it is my duty to instill in them confidence in who they are. It is important that they know: ‘My father thinks I am good enough.’ They don’t care what the world thinks, they just want to know that their father is proud.”
However, what happens when a father goes through an emotional struggle and believes that he has to hide it from his family, precisely because as head of the house he has to keep everything together?
“Mood and mental health among men is currently one of the biggest battles out there, because men haven’t been taught how to talk about emotions,” says Jo.
In his deep, drawling voice, Jo refers to one of his songs that touches on the very subject.
“Let It Rain” explores the wars that men fight in secret. Jo mentions that the subject is close to his heart, because our society “loses men unnecessarily”, as they were never taught how to identify and communicate their emotions.
“‘Let it rain’ explains that men may only cry when it rains, so that their tears will be covered by the raindrops. They may only shout when there is thunder, so that their cries will not be heard above the thunder.
“We mask our frustrations with storms, and with ‘Let it rain’ I want to tell men that we have to fight the wars we fight on our knees.”
The song, written by Jo Black and Francis Grobler and produced by Murray Lubbe, is the fourth release from Jo’s short album, The Revelationwhich was released earlier in April.
“This song is for every man who has felt he has to keep everything inside. We grew up with the idea that you can only cry in the rain, but I believe it’s time we break that ‘law’. If this song makes someone feel they are not alone, then it has achieved its goal,” says Jo.
How Jo views himself as a father figure is not an easy question to answer.
“I just know it’s my first time and there isn’t a manual for how to be a father or a parent. You just do what you think is best, and that’s through trial in errorbecause some things I do right and some things I may do completely wrong. My main goal is just to be a safe haven for my family,” explains Jo.
“I aim for my children to know one day that I tried everything possible to give them the best life I could and that I always stood behind them, no matter what mistakes they made or what decisions they made.
“I think every father has been at a point where he has asked silly, internal questions, such as whether he is good enough or whether his family might not deserve better. To those fathers, my message is: You are the best father your children could ask for.
“You don’t have to be the richest, strongest or most successful father. I don’t know of a child who loves a father based on how thick their wallet is. A father is a drawer’s first hero and his daughter’s first love. I think if more fathers start to understand that that love is unconditional and that they are worthy of that love, a lot of healing will start to happen.”